Hello on Saturday I went to see the Bodyworlds exhibition in Taipei with some fello huayu zhongxinners. It was weird and gross but acceptable. What freaked me out was the creepy German doctor who always wears this creepy black hat, whether he's being photographed with tennis players or shoving a corpse through a high-tech bandsaw and quickly throwing the slices into molten plastic. What p/ssed me off was the fact that there were only about three women's bodies, and none of them were playing sport like all the rest of them. I don't mean to sound like a paranoid feminist here, but when these plasticised human cadavers are being excavated 3000 years from now and kids are doing their school projects on the Ancient Westerners, we don't want them to think that all women did was have babies, do we?

In other news, Texas Boy threw up all over FM on Friday. I remembered how obnoxious he had been so I laughed but then I felt bad for him. I mean, I threw up at FM a few weeks ago but I know how to be discreet when I'm off my face.

Mystery of the Dismantled Scooter

In freakier news, the outer casing of my scooter was methodically dismantled with the aid of a screw driver some time after 2am Saturday after I got home and before 7am when I woke up and felt compelled to go and check on it. Lately I have been reverse parking because I find it easier to do, and because it makes it easier to find too, because no one else does it. So I walked up to where my scooter should be, and there's this skeleton of a scooter standing there looking cold and naked in the rain, crying "look what they've done to me, liz, look what they've done!" The first thing that occurred to me was that the engine was gone. I put the key in the ignition and everything started up normally. On the ground were the bolts and screws. Lying on top of the next few scooters along, were the plastic parts that go on the outside. Everything seemed to be there. I immediately turned on my racist defenses, rang Lily who came down to help me put it back together, and for one hour could not shut up about how Westerners are never this vindictive and twisted, although Lily said it happened in France all the time. I didn't care, all I wanted to do was blame the adjectival country and its people. So we speculated the possibilities. Had I offended someone lately? Xiao Pi has been playing games lately but I don't know if he has mental problems and the tendency to hang out at four in the morning with a screwdriver in the car park. The guys reckoned a part has to be missing from it - why else would they undo it like that? I drove it down to the main gate without any problems though, but I'll get it checked out anyway. Lily reckoned it was just a bunch of drunks who picked on my scooter because it was reverse parked. But later she said it had to be someone I knew, because they did no harm to the scooter, just caused me alot of trouble. What a way to make someone paranoid as hell - who could I have offended? What did I do? What did I say? Is someone trying to kill me? Hehe ;-)




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Now, I know it seems like all I talk about is my scooter, but really, it is my pride and joy and there's nothing I love more than my beautiful scooter. Its purchase meant that I spent the whole of May broke and hounded by the office for my tuition fees, and I can't remember the last time I actually walked up to Dong Bie. Life is grand with a scooter.   ¶ 16:11