Love at First Web Site
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Add another $23 to my expenses list. I had to buy a carry case for my A2 size pad of drawing paper. Aye yai yai!
Today I had lunch with Mum and Peter. Then I discovered that my car battery was flat which totally sucked. I'm going to call NRMA when I get home. But it didn't take long on the bus to Oxford St where there's an art supplies shop. That was where I had to get an A1 piece of graph paper and some cardboard to make a view finder, all for the Bronte-Bondi walk.
And that's all I have to say about that. Life is like a can of Bi-Lo spaghetti, you never know what it's like to have an income.
P.S. I've already thought of a new invention - something to hold your book for you when you're snuggled up in bed and you just can't get comfortable trying to hold the book up at the same time. Hmmm what will it look like. Like an adjustable music stand. Speaking of music, Mum brought down the keyboard so now it's in my room ready to be played. Whoo hoo! ¶ 16:44 0 Comments
Today I had lunch with Mum and Peter. Then I discovered that my car battery was flat which totally sucked. I'm going to call NRMA when I get home. But it didn't take long on the bus to Oxford St where there's an art supplies shop. That was where I had to get an A1 piece of graph paper and some cardboard to make a view finder, all for the Bronte-Bondi walk.
And that's all I have to say about that. Life is like a can of Bi-Lo spaghetti, you never know what it's like to have an income.
P.S. I've already thought of a new invention - something to hold your book for you when you're snuggled up in bed and you just can't get comfortable trying to hold the book up at the same time. Hmmm what will it look like. Like an adjustable music stand. Speaking of music, Mum brought down the keyboard so now it's in my room ready to be played. Whoo hoo! ¶ 16:44 0 Comments
Monday, February 27, 2006
Hi once again in the library, about to recall everything I ate on the weekend.
Friday: Maccas for dinner
Saturday: Maccas for breakfast, Epping Club for lunch, Thai for dinner
Sunday: fish and chips for lunch
I am a fatty now. So that, my friends, is what I ate.
Today is my first day of classes. Have a two-hour maths lecture at four, freaking out a bit. I had a dream that someone told me the whole course would be a repeat of 2-unit maths and after that for some reason I no longer worried about it. Now I'm worried about it. But Angelica and no doubt a few more others are in the same boat so we can drown together! Or plead that it's hardly relevant to our design degrees... whatever.
Lately I've been keeping the radio on while I sleep to see if it affects my dreams. It used to and it's kind of doing it now but not really.
OK I had dinner with the Indian guy on Saturday, he was a fucked-up psycho and when he insisted on walking me home and refusing to leave me alone when I essentially told him to fuck off, I felt compelled to call the cops. Psycho. Bad experience.
On Sunday morning Pamela dragged me along to the Hillsong Church in Waterloo. It was my first time ever at church on a Sunday morning. Jesus. It started off with a chick on a microphone going 'are you excited to be in the house of god?' and everyone stood up and started clapping to the (pop) music and of course I would have been a bit of a wet blanket if I didn't stand up aswell so I stood up like everyone else and for Pamela's sake clapped my hands. The lyrics were all about loving 'the One' who's 'the Son' whose kingdom will 'come' etc. When the music was over they got straight down to business: Give Us All Your Money, arguing that it was good to give and they were helping tsunami victims in Sri Lanka. I was disgusted, but not surprised. A bit of a skeptic, I looked around me and saw people with their eyes closed looking so earnest, with one or two arms raised in the air, as if they were praying really fucking hard. This is essentially what I saw on Sunday morning: a large organisation abusing gullible Jesus-lovers by making a packet out of them and sucking them in with really fucked up crappy songs about "the Son" then asking for money by telling them that if they really believed they would give. I already knew that churches are notorious for this, but I didn't expect it to be so.. what's the word, flagrant. It was so fucking tacky with the live video streams being shown on the THREE screens in the middle and on either side of the stage. They record every session so they can sell them at the 'resource centre'. The only good thing was the free coffee afterwards. And everyone was so friendly. I met this chick who was in this highschool program. She told me that youth should be "given a choice" whether to be Christian or not. When I was in highschool, I had no choice in participating in one of these stupid programs where they told you that Jesus loves you etc etc and I was down eleven bucks after it. They never told us it was a Christian thing, they only said it was a development program or something. Enough bitching about Christianity, going to church on Sunday only strengthened my non-beliefs. ¶ 12:13 0 Comments
Friday: Maccas for dinner
Saturday: Maccas for breakfast, Epping Club for lunch, Thai for dinner
Sunday: fish and chips for lunch
I am a fatty now. So that, my friends, is what I ate.
Today is my first day of classes. Have a two-hour maths lecture at four, freaking out a bit. I had a dream that someone told me the whole course would be a repeat of 2-unit maths and after that for some reason I no longer worried about it. Now I'm worried about it. But Angelica and no doubt a few more others are in the same boat so we can drown together! Or plead that it's hardly relevant to our design degrees... whatever.
Lately I've been keeping the radio on while I sleep to see if it affects my dreams. It used to and it's kind of doing it now but not really.
OK I had dinner with the Indian guy on Saturday, he was a fucked-up psycho and when he insisted on walking me home and refusing to leave me alone when I essentially told him to fuck off, I felt compelled to call the cops. Psycho. Bad experience.
On Sunday morning Pamela dragged me along to the Hillsong Church in Waterloo. It was my first time ever at church on a Sunday morning. Jesus. It started off with a chick on a microphone going 'are you excited to be in the house of god?' and everyone stood up and started clapping to the (pop) music and of course I would have been a bit of a wet blanket if I didn't stand up aswell so I stood up like everyone else and for Pamela's sake clapped my hands. The lyrics were all about loving 'the One' who's 'the Son' whose kingdom will 'come' etc. When the music was over they got straight down to business: Give Us All Your Money, arguing that it was good to give and they were helping tsunami victims in Sri Lanka. I was disgusted, but not surprised. A bit of a skeptic, I looked around me and saw people with their eyes closed looking so earnest, with one or two arms raised in the air, as if they were praying really fucking hard. This is essentially what I saw on Sunday morning: a large organisation abusing gullible Jesus-lovers by making a packet out of them and sucking them in with really fucked up crappy songs about "the Son" then asking for money by telling them that if they really believed they would give. I already knew that churches are notorious for this, but I didn't expect it to be so.. what's the word, flagrant. It was so fucking tacky with the live video streams being shown on the THREE screens in the middle and on either side of the stage. They record every session so they can sell them at the 'resource centre'. The only good thing was the free coffee afterwards. And everyone was so friendly. I met this chick who was in this highschool program. She told me that youth should be "given a choice" whether to be Christian or not. When I was in highschool, I had no choice in participating in one of these stupid programs where they told you that Jesus loves you etc etc and I was down eleven bucks after it. They never told us it was a Christian thing, they only said it was a development program or something. Enough bitching about Christianity, going to church on Sunday only strengthened my non-beliefs. ¶ 12:13 0 Comments
Friday, February 24, 2006
Well let's just say classes haven't even begun yet and I'm already having a good time. Yesterday I checked out the cinema society but didn't join coz it cost fifteen bucks. Then last night at the party the president who I spoke to remembered me and came and talked to me and I took the oppurtunity to ask him to let me join for free. And that is exactly what I did about twenty minutes ago. The party was good, Pamela piked out initially so I went the Bondi Junction to go window shopping and dream of working in all the design boutiques there (bloody Eastern suburbs!) and when I came back I just went stuff it and told Pamela it wasn't too late to go if she changed her mind. So she changed her mind. Dude, there was a crowd of people three metres thick around the bar and we had to wait for like forty five minutes to get out drinks. Then when we were sitting outside this Indian guy who grew up in NZ came up to us and was really funny and made us laugh alot. Then we had a dance and this Sri Lankan guy asked if he could 'hold' me and I told him I had a BF. Then back to the garden where we had another beer and Anan the Indian guy came back and he made a flower out of my cigarette. How sweet. Then the babe cinema society guy came back and I wondered what my chances were. Hence going back today. I wondered whether he was the president of the club and behold he is. So I have officially joined three clubs: 'cinesoc', the chocolate society, and the Chinese Students Association. I wonder how many other honkies joined that society. Anyway Pamela and I get along quite well and she had promoised to take me to the best restaurants next time I visit Singapore. Fully sick!
Today I'm going a-rockclimbing then I'm seeing 'Date Movie' with Melwa, Jimwa, and Laurenwa, who I haven't seen, come to think of it, in many years. Wow! Last time Mel talked about her she said Lauren had stopped eating out because she thought the food would be poisoned. Dude that's pretty serious, take it from me. A bit of risperdal will fix that.
So YAY I'm STILL excited about uni, I don't mind doing it all over again, because it's like having a second stab at it. I don't want to be too quick to say this but UNSW people are much friendlier, funnier, nicer etc. Pam reckons it's because Sydney attracts all the pretentious people while UNSW takes all the normal people... but is still a good uni.
There's no camp for ID instead there's a walking tour from Bronte to Bondi and we have to bring stuff like charcoal, pastels, and our visual diaries which means we'll be doing some funky stuff on the way. We get to go swimming too and afterwards is dinner at Bondi (hence the $30 fee... I guess...)
Being poor for the next four years may not be so bad. Also I just heard from German George that it's dead easy to get engineering-type jobs in China. I also read on Core77 that it's easy to get a job in Hong Kong (FULLY SICK!) although they work you harder. And in China they work you hard and you don't get paid much. But it's not about the money :-) Obviously. ¶ 13:53 0 Comments
Today I'm going a-rockclimbing then I'm seeing 'Date Movie' with Melwa, Jimwa, and Laurenwa, who I haven't seen, come to think of it, in many years. Wow! Last time Mel talked about her she said Lauren had stopped eating out because she thought the food would be poisoned. Dude that's pretty serious, take it from me. A bit of risperdal will fix that.
So YAY I'm STILL excited about uni, I don't mind doing it all over again, because it's like having a second stab at it. I don't want to be too quick to say this but UNSW people are much friendlier, funnier, nicer etc. Pam reckons it's because Sydney attracts all the pretentious people while UNSW takes all the normal people... but is still a good uni.
There's no camp for ID instead there's a walking tour from Bronte to Bondi and we have to bring stuff like charcoal, pastels, and our visual diaries which means we'll be doing some funky stuff on the way. We get to go swimming too and afterwards is dinner at Bondi (hence the $30 fee... I guess...)
Being poor for the next four years may not be so bad. Also I just heard from German George that it's dead easy to get engineering-type jobs in China. I also read on Core77 that it's easy to get a job in Hong Kong (FULLY SICK!) although they work you harder. And in China they work you hard and you don't get paid much. But it's not about the money :-) Obviously. ¶ 13:53 0 Comments
Thursday, February 23, 2006
[whispering] well, here I am in the UNSW library, looking for the section on ID. Feeling like a bit of a nerd, seeing as though I don't have the internet at home, the library is going to become my new part-time hangout, if I continue to be a blog-addict.
[still whispering] today I'm going to the mature-age student afternoon tea. Tonight Pamela and I are going to the O-Week dance party on campus. Should be good, haven't had a dance for ages, except if you count the times I demonstrated on the verandah to Kate and Shane how I would dance if noone was watching. Also the other night Luke and I saw Brokeback Mountain. Heath Ledger really is hot, I just never realised. I think Ang Lee must be really good. Jake Gylenhaal was really good.
[talking at normal tone now] Fuck man I didn't get that stupid warehouse job. I'll tell ya what, they're pretty picky for some menial shit. So now I'm broke style in the hood. Eatin' rice just to get by, one day I'm gonna fly, in the sky, fry rye! I called up this guy looking for a cleaner to work five hours a week, and he must be fucking psychotic because this is what he said about the pay "I know a professional cleaner who charges 14.50 an hour, so what I'm offering is $9 an hour."
-Pardon, sorry?
-I'm offering $9 an hour.
(Not having a clue what to say right now, making time to see the ear doctor)
-Ummm, OK. Well, I guess I could find something else then. (YOU F-ING LUNATIC!)
I should have said something more exciting like, "Well GOOD LUCK, BUDDY!" or "Why, you must be out of your right mind! Noone will work for you!"
Fucking psycho. Tight-arse thinking he can bloody well have it all. Clean it yourself!
Then there was a newsagent in Coogee who only wanted people with experience in newsagents. How hard is it too hand out scratchies all day? But I nevertheless rattled on about my extensive experience in "Customer Service" and cash-handling. I was desperate. And she knew it. Bitch. ;-) Just joking.
On the brighter side of things, there's this research place on campus who hand out free contact lenses to look at your eyes. Fully sick!
Love Lizwa ¶ 13:14 0 Comments
[still whispering] today I'm going to the mature-age student afternoon tea. Tonight Pamela and I are going to the O-Week dance party on campus. Should be good, haven't had a dance for ages, except if you count the times I demonstrated on the verandah to Kate and Shane how I would dance if noone was watching. Also the other night Luke and I saw Brokeback Mountain. Heath Ledger really is hot, I just never realised. I think Ang Lee must be really good. Jake Gylenhaal was really good.
[talking at normal tone now] Fuck man I didn't get that stupid warehouse job. I'll tell ya what, they're pretty picky for some menial shit. So now I'm broke style in the hood. Eatin' rice just to get by, one day I'm gonna fly, in the sky, fry rye! I called up this guy looking for a cleaner to work five hours a week, and he must be fucking psychotic because this is what he said about the pay "I know a professional cleaner who charges 14.50 an hour, so what I'm offering is $9 an hour."
-Pardon, sorry?
-I'm offering $9 an hour.
(Not having a clue what to say right now, making time to see the ear doctor)
-Ummm, OK. Well, I guess I could find something else then. (YOU F-ING LUNATIC!)
I should have said something more exciting like, "Well GOOD LUCK, BUDDY!" or "Why, you must be out of your right mind! Noone will work for you!"
Fucking psycho. Tight-arse thinking he can bloody well have it all. Clean it yourself!
Then there was a newsagent in Coogee who only wanted people with experience in newsagents. How hard is it too hand out scratchies all day? But I nevertheless rattled on about my extensive experience in "Customer Service" and cash-handling. I was desperate. And she knew it. Bitch. ;-) Just joking.
On the brighter side of things, there's this research place on campus who hand out free contact lenses to look at your eyes. Fully sick!
Love Lizwa ¶ 13:14 0 Comments
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
How to Study Industrial Design by Lizzy Lizwa
You will need:
$508 for bond
$254 for two weeks rent
$250 for Union fees
$50 for carpark swipecard
$75 for materials such as set squares and protractors and graphic pens
$30 for compulsory field trip
TOTAL $1167
Method
1. Get really really excited!
2. Aaaaah... freak out!
3. Make a friend who is doing the same course and also only did General Maths in highschool
4. Discover that TWO, yes TWO of your new flatmates are Chinese and they're both willing to practice with ya!
5. SEX your new flat and get so excited about having dinner parties that you even invite your Dad, stepmother, and half-brother over for dinner!
6. Walk down the street realising you're actually going to be studying design for the next four years aaaah exciting!
7. In welcome presentation get shown pictures of the graduates that are designing cars for Ford and phones for Nokia!
Serves one. ¶ 10:35 0 Comments
You will need:
$508 for bond
$254 for two weeks rent
$250 for Union fees
$50 for carpark swipecard
$75 for materials such as set squares and protractors and graphic pens
$30 for compulsory field trip
TOTAL $1167
Method
1. Get really really excited!
2. Aaaaah... freak out!
3. Make a friend who is doing the same course and also only did General Maths in highschool
4. Discover that TWO, yes TWO of your new flatmates are Chinese and they're both willing to practice with ya!
5. SEX your new flat and get so excited about having dinner parties that you even invite your Dad, stepmother, and half-brother over for dinner!
6. Walk down the street realising you're actually going to be studying design for the next four years aaaah exciting!
7. In welcome presentation get shown pictures of the graduates that are designing cars for Ford and phones for Nokia!
Serves one. ¶ 10:35 0 Comments
Saturday, February 18, 2006
I've lived in my appartment for three days now and I've been very excited and have nearly spent all my money stocking the pantry. I cooked dinner for Rose 'n' Co last night. It was supposed to be spaghetti and meatballs but it turned out to be bolognaise coz the balls were to soft. Prolly add more bread crumbs next time.
My room is the biggest in the appartment and the two flatmates that have already moved in are quite nice. One is a Singaporean girl called Pamela. She is Christian so I automatically like her coz most CHristians are nice people. Then there's Leo who seems to be alright.
Dinner was lots of fun last night, three of us shared five bottles of red wine and we went on a big walking tour of randwick to find a place to buy more. Pamela came with us, it was her first night in Australia and at dinner she asked if she was interrupting something coz she felt a bit out of place.
ANyway I had too much coffee last night and didn't get to sleep until FIVE AM and then Fi rand at ten and that was it. I'm four hours of sleep behind, man. Then Luke dropped the dresser over and then by the time I was falling asleep again Fi came over. We went and had coffee in Coogee. Speaking of Fi, her writing career is really kicking off, she's been published in a national journal of new writers and in a magazine called Yen although they got someone to go over her article and totally change is so that there were to co-writers.
I'm so fucking tired right now and I wish I had a DVD player so I could watch Raise the Red Lantern or something.
OKILY DOKILY NEIGHBOURINO I'M IN AN INTERNET CAFE SO UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES CAN I OPEN MY RSVP KISSES RIGHT NOW.
O-Week is next week, they have free pancake breakfasts every morning at nine. Faculty welcome is at ten and I also have an appointment with a spychiatrist [sic] on Thursday followed by afternoon tea for mature-age students. If he/she psycho-analyses me I'll write all about it on this blog.
OH am no longer bored, just invited myself over to Rose's place!
BYE FOR NOW
LIZWA
HI KATE I MISS YOU AND DON'T WORRY I'LL BE BACK IN TUMUT IN NO TIME ONCE I FAIL GENERAL MATHS 1B, JUST GIVE ME A FEW MONTHS! ¶ 19:49 0 Comments
My room is the biggest in the appartment and the two flatmates that have already moved in are quite nice. One is a Singaporean girl called Pamela. She is Christian so I automatically like her coz most CHristians are nice people. Then there's Leo who seems to be alright.
Dinner was lots of fun last night, three of us shared five bottles of red wine and we went on a big walking tour of randwick to find a place to buy more. Pamela came with us, it was her first night in Australia and at dinner she asked if she was interrupting something coz she felt a bit out of place.
ANyway I had too much coffee last night and didn't get to sleep until FIVE AM and then Fi rand at ten and that was it. I'm four hours of sleep behind, man. Then Luke dropped the dresser over and then by the time I was falling asleep again Fi came over. We went and had coffee in Coogee. Speaking of Fi, her writing career is really kicking off, she's been published in a national journal of new writers and in a magazine called Yen although they got someone to go over her article and totally change is so that there were to co-writers.
I'm so fucking tired right now and I wish I had a DVD player so I could watch Raise the Red Lantern or something.
OKILY DOKILY NEIGHBOURINO I'M IN AN INTERNET CAFE SO UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES CAN I OPEN MY RSVP KISSES RIGHT NOW.
O-Week is next week, they have free pancake breakfasts every morning at nine. Faculty welcome is at ten and I also have an appointment with a spychiatrist [sic] on Thursday followed by afternoon tea for mature-age students. If he/she psycho-analyses me I'll write all about it on this blog.
OH am no longer bored, just invited myself over to Rose's place!
BYE FOR NOW
LIZWA
HI KATE I MISS YOU AND DON'T WORRY I'LL BE BACK IN TUMUT IN NO TIME ONCE I FAIL GENERAL MATHS 1B, JUST GIVE ME A FEW MONTHS! ¶ 19:49 0 Comments
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Happy Valentine's Day.
No roses, but a wonderful "happy Valentine's Day, I wasn't sure what your thoughts on valentine's day are, but I thought I'd mention it..." etc...
I really enjoyed lunch today. I had super-flaky croissant at the Coach House and well after having doubted the extent to which I was attracted to Luke I thoroughly enjoyed talking to him. He's kinda cute. The other night I dreamt that my music teacher, who was a dead ringer for Robert Downey Jr., was in love with me, and I was in love with him, and when he finally sat down at the piano with me, I kissed him, and it was just meant to be. I can't remember the last time I felt that way about someone. Probably my first-year Chinese lecturer Mr K. He was a little flirty himself, and if I hadn't been only 17 at the time, I would have taken it upon myself to up the ante a bit. GET THIS, he disappeared from USYD a while ago but last week I found his name on the list of part-time teachers at the Chinese department of UNSW. Man I'd love to have a coffee with him, four years after I was only just beginning to learn Chinese. I had a huge crush on him; that was probably the last time someone inspired such a feeling. Now, at age 21, this is literally the stuff of dreams.
Or, maybe a I have a thing for teachers. ¶ 18:33 0 Comments
No roses, but a wonderful "happy Valentine's Day, I wasn't sure what your thoughts on valentine's day are, but I thought I'd mention it..." etc...
I really enjoyed lunch today. I had super-flaky croissant at the Coach House and well after having doubted the extent to which I was attracted to Luke I thoroughly enjoyed talking to him. He's kinda cute. The other night I dreamt that my music teacher, who was a dead ringer for Robert Downey Jr., was in love with me, and I was in love with him, and when he finally sat down at the piano with me, I kissed him, and it was just meant to be. I can't remember the last time I felt that way about someone. Probably my first-year Chinese lecturer Mr K. He was a little flirty himself, and if I hadn't been only 17 at the time, I would have taken it upon myself to up the ante a bit. GET THIS, he disappeared from USYD a while ago but last week I found his name on the list of part-time teachers at the Chinese department of UNSW. Man I'd love to have a coffee with him, four years after I was only just beginning to learn Chinese. I had a huge crush on him; that was probably the last time someone inspired such a feeling. Now, at age 21, this is literally the stuff of dreams.
Or, maybe a I have a thing for teachers. ¶ 18:33 0 Comments
Sunday, February 12, 2006
The winter Olympics are on TV. I'm about to drink my third cup of tea. The boys are in bed. Mary just came over and I told her I 'hooked up'. Have been keeping her updated. I'm tired. I started packing my car today. Ella's going to help me move. I went to the river with Luke today. No dinner on Valentine's Day, just lunch. I wonder if I'll get a rose or something, that would be the first time! How sad. Lots of articles about happy singles in the paper today. A 40 year old air-hostess. If I'm single at thirty-two, I'm going on RSVP, setting up a wedding, and having my baby. Just need to choose that sperm donor. It's just science really. Would my eyes look good with his jaw? Date, date, date! I'm leaving Tumut on Wednesday. Kate has turned into Aunty Kate and is nagging me about my car. I washed it today.
Sydney, I'm a coming your way! I'm hitting the big time! I'm outa here! Er-mah-gahd. You killed Kenny.
OK it's time for some more apsiring writer-ing.
Her long flowing white dress blinded her mother who proceeded to put on her sunglasses. Inside the church. Just like in the movies, her soon-to-be husband was standing at the front waiting for her as she glided down the aisle, a tear of innocent joy growing from the corner of his eye. These were their vows - "I'm totally in love with you and I want my babies to look like you. Brains I can work on after the birth."
The photographer, who was a friend of her stepmother, stuffed up all the photos so that they were blotchy and unprofessional. So everyone got together and contributed their own shots into an album just for them. "Happy baby-making" said the cards on the gifts.
The couple got down to business but agreed that like dolphins, they had to have sex for fun, and that it would be OK to have fun sex with other people. As long as they got their baby and continued their lineages for posterity.
But when they did do it, they made it good. She started off by coming back from the bathroom in a minimally-sized red lacy negligee. She leaned against the doorway as he waited for her in bed. She walked to the end of the bed and well did some stuff. Then he said "I want to eat you all up". She roared with laughter, tore off the negligee and jumped on top of him. They did it a couple of times and repeated this everyday till she was pregnant. Afterwards they whispered sweet nothings in each other's ears, such as: "Wow that was amazing, give me a drag, whoooo" and "there are now 700,000 people on RSVP, where as eight years ago there were only 5000... make that 699,998! Ha ha, ha ha ha."
Her husband was a dork. He was a doctor though, which meant her kids would go to private schools where each student bought their own textbooks rather than loaning old tattered ones from the school. While he was at uni he drove a cab to support himself. He made a trip back to India every 18 months.
OK that's enough for today. ¶ 22:02 0 Comments
Sydney, I'm a coming your way! I'm hitting the big time! I'm outa here! Er-mah-gahd. You killed Kenny.
OK it's time for some more apsiring writer-ing.
Her long flowing white dress blinded her mother who proceeded to put on her sunglasses. Inside the church. Just like in the movies, her soon-to-be husband was standing at the front waiting for her as she glided down the aisle, a tear of innocent joy growing from the corner of his eye. These were their vows - "I'm totally in love with you and I want my babies to look like you. Brains I can work on after the birth."
The photographer, who was a friend of her stepmother, stuffed up all the photos so that they were blotchy and unprofessional. So everyone got together and contributed their own shots into an album just for them. "Happy baby-making" said the cards on the gifts.
The couple got down to business but agreed that like dolphins, they had to have sex for fun, and that it would be OK to have fun sex with other people. As long as they got their baby and continued their lineages for posterity.
But when they did do it, they made it good. She started off by coming back from the bathroom in a minimally-sized red lacy negligee. She leaned against the doorway as he waited for her in bed. She walked to the end of the bed and well did some stuff. Then he said "I want to eat you all up". She roared with laughter, tore off the negligee and jumped on top of him. They did it a couple of times and repeated this everyday till she was pregnant. Afterwards they whispered sweet nothings in each other's ears, such as: "Wow that was amazing, give me a drag, whoooo" and "there are now 700,000 people on RSVP, where as eight years ago there were only 5000... make that 699,998! Ha ha, ha ha ha."
Her husband was a dork. He was a doctor though, which meant her kids would go to private schools where each student bought their own textbooks rather than loaning old tattered ones from the school. While he was at uni he drove a cab to support himself. He made a trip back to India every 18 months.
OK that's enough for today. ¶ 22:02 0 Comments
Saturday, February 11, 2006
I said to Bob
I said "find me a job"
We hired a video
And watched "The Blob".
Bob said to me
Somebody will employ you
To the far east
The army will deploy you.
"I feel pretty useless"
I said to old Bob
Bob said never mind
But I began to sob.
"Here have some chocolate"
Bob said to me
"Do this silly course
And then we will see."
"There's to much maths"
I reminded him
As I threw four years of Chinese
Into the bin.
I grabbed the guitar
And sung a small ditty
My friend Bob
He is so witty
"You have to be talented
To succeed in I.D."
But Bob said "indeed,
That's the idea."
Four years later
I got my degree
And found a job
Working at IKEA.
It helped me out
At the interview
"You're into furniture,
and I am too!" ¶ 17:02 0 Comments
I said "find me a job"
We hired a video
And watched "The Blob".
Bob said to me
Somebody will employ you
To the far east
The army will deploy you.
"I feel pretty useless"
I said to old Bob
Bob said never mind
But I began to sob.
"Here have some chocolate"
Bob said to me
"Do this silly course
And then we will see."
"There's to much maths"
I reminded him
As I threw four years of Chinese
Into the bin.
I grabbed the guitar
And sung a small ditty
My friend Bob
He is so witty
"You have to be talented
To succeed in I.D."
But Bob said "indeed,
That's the idea."
Four years later
I got my degree
And found a job
Working at IKEA.
It helped me out
At the interview
"You're into furniture,
and I am too!" ¶ 17:02 0 Comments
Summer Repeats II: May 24, 2004
Culture Shock II: The Second Wave
Reckless Complaining and Angry Bitching
I had a bit of a scooter tiff yesterday. My brakes decided not to work, or I just decided to die rather than squeeze them hard enough. So I kind of drove into the back left corner of this car, and while I was busy stressing over the damage my scooter was doing to the car I did a bit of a tipping-over routine where my right big toe nail bent in half backwards and my knee got all scratched and bloody. The princess that I am insisted on seeing a doctor to get it all cleaned up so that it wouldn't get infected which is more likely to happen here with all the dirty air, and besides the pain in my toe was nasty.
At the hospital I was sitting there getting a band-aid put on my knee like I had fallen over at kindy or something and as usual a crowd of nosy foreigner-fans gathered at the door way to watch The Foreigner get some disinfectant cream swabbed over her Foreign toe. Then godammit I started crying just because I was hung over, irritable and generally just traumatised thanks to my dodgy brakes and I was judged a "xiao pengyou" by the Injured-Foreigner Fan-Club. Racism is contagious here. Let me make a politically incorrect sweeping generalisation about the Chinese - I have found them far more
You missed it! I deleted it ten minutes later.
Today I popped into a couple of schools to offer my services as a subsitute teacher and well frankly, telling them that I am Australian is the same as walking into a modeling agency with a donut stuffed in your mouth. You can see the "NO" spread over their faces faster than you can say "American accent." Why do they want an American accent anyway? Its so sad and pathetic really. Its an insult to the English. Growl, etc. Its not PMS either.
In other news, sorry Mum, but apparently I'm verging on alcoholism, toeing the line etc. A concerned friend approached me about it. What am I supposed to do if I can't drink?
***************************
Dig the part where I deleted bitching about the Chinese! I remember that!
That was Andrew who asked me if I was alcoholic. He told me about how is uncle was, and he was quite serious about me being one. I tried to explain that Australia is a country of binge-drinkers and we lack the sophisticated drinking culture of other western countries but alas it is the same as alcoholism. ¶ 12:16 0 Comments
Culture Shock II: The Second Wave
Reckless Complaining and Angry Bitching
I had a bit of a scooter tiff yesterday. My brakes decided not to work, or I just decided to die rather than squeeze them hard enough. So I kind of drove into the back left corner of this car, and while I was busy stressing over the damage my scooter was doing to the car I did a bit of a tipping-over routine where my right big toe nail bent in half backwards and my knee got all scratched and bloody. The princess that I am insisted on seeing a doctor to get it all cleaned up so that it wouldn't get infected which is more likely to happen here with all the dirty air, and besides the pain in my toe was nasty.
At the hospital I was sitting there getting a band-aid put on my knee like I had fallen over at kindy or something and as usual a crowd of nosy foreigner-fans gathered at the door way to watch The Foreigner get some disinfectant cream swabbed over her Foreign toe. Then godammit I started crying just because I was hung over, irritable and generally just traumatised thanks to my dodgy brakes and I was judged a "xiao pengyou" by the Injured-Foreigner Fan-Club. Racism is contagious here. Let me make a politically incorrect sweeping generalisation about the Chinese - I have found them far more
You missed it! I deleted it ten minutes later.
Today I popped into a couple of schools to offer my services as a subsitute teacher and well frankly, telling them that I am Australian is the same as walking into a modeling agency with a donut stuffed in your mouth. You can see the "NO" spread over their faces faster than you can say "American accent." Why do they want an American accent anyway? Its so sad and pathetic really. Its an insult to the English. Growl, etc. Its not PMS either.
In other news, sorry Mum, but apparently I'm verging on alcoholism, toeing the line etc. A concerned friend approached me about it. What am I supposed to do if I can't drink?
***************************
Dig the part where I deleted bitching about the Chinese! I remember that!
That was Andrew who asked me if I was alcoholic. He told me about how is uncle was, and he was quite serious about me being one. I tried to explain that Australia is a country of binge-drinkers and we lack the sophisticated drinking culture of other western countries but alas it is the same as alcoholism. ¶ 12:16 0 Comments
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Something to blog home about
Well Luke and I kissed on the couch. He asked "would you mind if I kissed you?" and I'm like all nervous and I said yes I've been meaning to ask you the same thing. After we kissed we joked about how it should take two people of our age so long to get that far and then we kissed some more. Tonight he's coming over to eat the trout he caught last night at the river.
I am starting the trigonometry chapter, which is chapter 3 and it's all really annoying me because getting it requires trial and error and strong efforts to remember stuff we did in class 5 years ago.
I'm in email correspondence with about five men from RSVP - must send them an "RSVP" telling them I can't make it.
Love Lizwa ¶ 16:34 0 Comments
Well Luke and I kissed on the couch. He asked "would you mind if I kissed you?" and I'm like all nervous and I said yes I've been meaning to ask you the same thing. After we kissed we joked about how it should take two people of our age so long to get that far and then we kissed some more. Tonight he's coming over to eat the trout he caught last night at the river.
I am starting the trigonometry chapter, which is chapter 3 and it's all really annoying me because getting it requires trial and error and strong efforts to remember stuff we did in class 5 years ago.
I'm in email correspondence with about five men from RSVP - must send them an "RSVP" telling them I can't make it.
Love Lizwa ¶ 16:34 0 Comments
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Hello there today I recorded a promo message at the radio station. It says I'm Liz and when I spend the summer in Tumut 96.3 is the station for me! Corny-factor 10.
I also tried to do some maths today and I don't understand shit which is going to be a small problemo during the semester. Hmmm. Failing. Hmmm. I'll have to get tutoring.
Tonight I'm going for a bit of a fish.
For lunch I cracked open a can of 'braised beef and onions' which was slop. I dipped toast in it.
I'm officially moving back on Wednesday. Sign the lease at 1:30 so have to leave here a bit early. Oh-my-god.
There was a girl called Elizabeth
Her room was a bit of a mess
She burped and farted and was crass
And now she's going to fail maths
So off she went to Sydney town
And turned that smile into a frown
As she saw her place for the first time
And realised it was not worth a dime
She tried to hire a cheap tutor
And find textbooks on the computer
But could not find a single one
And failing won't be fun.
So she failed maths and decided to drop
The course altogether and live on slop
She got a job and the local Coles
And asked the doctor to remove some moles
She is still at Coles to this very day
While the sun shines making hay
If only she had tried to pass
But now her dreams are a mere farce.
The End ¶ 15:09 0 Comments
I also tried to do some maths today and I don't understand shit which is going to be a small problemo during the semester. Hmmm. Failing. Hmmm. I'll have to get tutoring.
Tonight I'm going for a bit of a fish.
For lunch I cracked open a can of 'braised beef and onions' which was slop. I dipped toast in it.
I'm officially moving back on Wednesday. Sign the lease at 1:30 so have to leave here a bit early. Oh-my-god.
There was a girl called Elizabeth
Her room was a bit of a mess
She burped and farted and was crass
And now she's going to fail maths
So off she went to Sydney town
And turned that smile into a frown
As she saw her place for the first time
And realised it was not worth a dime
She tried to hire a cheap tutor
And find textbooks on the computer
But could not find a single one
And failing won't be fun.
So she failed maths and decided to drop
The course altogether and live on slop
She got a job and the local Coles
And asked the doctor to remove some moles
She is still at Coles to this very day
While the sun shines making hay
If only she had tried to pass
But now her dreams are a mere farce.
The End ¶ 15:09 0 Comments
Monday, February 06, 2006
Well I had a good weekend which involved betting on horses and a bit of dancing at the Wynyard. I finally got a chance to wear my new dress which unforunately hangs down over my boobs and reveals my bra because my boobs are too small to fill it out. God damn! But I looked good anyway haha and felt good. I also kept up with the three guys I was with with drinks but naturally had to slow down after a few because I was really getting drunk which I never do anymore. I won about four bucks on my first bet. I bet about two bucks each time and the bookies kept saying "good on you" when I walked away with a big lucky smile on my face. Speaking of luck I bought a scratchy today, must go and scratch it...
No didn't win anything not even two bucks. There goes that around-the-world ticket. Was never interested in South Africa anyway (lots of them stop there.)
I got drunk and I think revealed my interest in Luke through a series of "wait at the Woolpack, I'll come and meet you" "no I can't" and "yes she can" messages sent my me and Mary from my phone. I don't know if he's interested in me but his friends did a little joking around which could mean anything. Well, before I think too much about it, will stop and start reading my eight dollar Marie Claire that I bought today. Couldn't afford it or the scratchy but I guess that's what happens when you get a taste for gambling on your first day at the races!
Today is Kate's first day at TAFE and very excited for her, she must be pumped and this is her first formal education since business college. Yay!
Look what I found: Top Dating Tips.com Yay man, I think this is the beginning of something umm... good. Last night I had a dream that my boyfriend and I (boyfriend? what boyfriend?) told everyone we were getting married as a joke so people started buying us presents and my family started organising the wedding. Then all my teeth fell out (apparently one of the most commonly occurring dreams which means you are worried about your appearance, which I was yesterday because I discovered dark little stains developing on my teeth); then I woke up. ¶ 13:53 0 Comments
No didn't win anything not even two bucks. There goes that around-the-world ticket. Was never interested in South Africa anyway (lots of them stop there.)
I got drunk and I think revealed my interest in Luke through a series of "wait at the Woolpack, I'll come and meet you" "no I can't" and "yes she can" messages sent my me and Mary from my phone. I don't know if he's interested in me but his friends did a little joking around which could mean anything. Well, before I think too much about it, will stop and start reading my eight dollar Marie Claire that I bought today. Couldn't afford it or the scratchy but I guess that's what happens when you get a taste for gambling on your first day at the races!
Today is Kate's first day at TAFE and very excited for her, she must be pumped and this is her first formal education since business college. Yay!
Look what I found: Top Dating Tips.com Yay man, I think this is the beginning of something umm... good. Last night I had a dream that my boyfriend and I (boyfriend? what boyfriend?) told everyone we were getting married as a joke so people started buying us presents and my family started organising the wedding. Then all my teeth fell out (apparently one of the most commonly occurring dreams which means you are worried about your appearance, which I was yesterday because I discovered dark little stains developing on my teeth); then I woke up. ¶ 13:53 0 Comments
Thursday, February 02, 2006
Today I am blogging on request (from Kate). Well yesterday arvo we went to the river yet again. Today I bought "A House is Not a Home" by Polly Adler who was a madam in New York for years. Interesting story, her father sent her over from Russia when she was 13 and her family who was supposed to follow never did. She was basically left to fend for herself staying at friend's of friend's and lived in poverty until one day a boot legger offered to let her live in an appartment where he could meet his lover. The business grew from there. Also reading Don Quixote and Last Year of Being Single. Haven't done any maths today. Already can't be bothered. Saw the doctor today, she said there would be alot of maths involved in I.D. now I'm wondering whether I'm doing the right thing. Hang on, I was wondering that yesterday. What the hell, I'll do it for a year and if I don't like it I'll get a fucking job and travel which is my life's ambition anyway.
Nelson's first day of school was yesterday. I shed a tear and remembered how exciting it was for me at the tender age of four. This morning at about three he woke the house up screaming in agony with stomach pains and because I was half asleep I thought he had been possessed by an evil spirit. Then I woke up later in the morning and once again questioned my ever-fragile sanity.
The Chinese department at UNSW has a study program in Kunming every aussie summer. It would probably be at least $4000 so I might not do it but what I do plan to do is save up another grand and just spend the summer travelling around China again to brush up on my Chinese and see Shanghai which I so tragically missed out on a year ago. Man, I haven't been inside an airport for nearly a year. Shit. And I won't plan a thing, I'll just go from place to place and see what's happening. I never had a martial arts class at Shaolin which I wanted to do when I was there last so might do that.
Tonight on the dinner menu is soy marinated chicken drumsticks.
I edited my profile on RSVP. I sent a nice kiss back to this guy studying medecine even though I didn't like his photo but now he's sent me an email and I don't want to write back. There's this other guy who lives in the blue mountains and likes nature and meditation and the guy who does consulting for small businesses and went to Belgium to look for chocolate.
We've cooked a dozen or so recipes from the book Mum gave me for my birthday. The last one was lamb with onion marmalade. My farts smelt exactly like onion afterwards. Well that's enough vulgarity for one day.
That Core 77 website is good, there's this competition for students to design a futuristic but realistic vehicle inside and out and that would really tickle me to do something like that so I must enter it next year when I'm a little more qualified.
OK CIAO CIAO I'm going to get stuck into equations that mean curved lines and shit like that.
Love
Lizwa ¶ 17:28 0 Comments
Nelson's first day of school was yesterday. I shed a tear and remembered how exciting it was for me at the tender age of four. This morning at about three he woke the house up screaming in agony with stomach pains and because I was half asleep I thought he had been possessed by an evil spirit. Then I woke up later in the morning and once again questioned my ever-fragile sanity.
The Chinese department at UNSW has a study program in Kunming every aussie summer. It would probably be at least $4000 so I might not do it but what I do plan to do is save up another grand and just spend the summer travelling around China again to brush up on my Chinese and see Shanghai which I so tragically missed out on a year ago. Man, I haven't been inside an airport for nearly a year. Shit. And I won't plan a thing, I'll just go from place to place and see what's happening. I never had a martial arts class at Shaolin which I wanted to do when I was there last so might do that.
Tonight on the dinner menu is soy marinated chicken drumsticks.
I edited my profile on RSVP. I sent a nice kiss back to this guy studying medecine even though I didn't like his photo but now he's sent me an email and I don't want to write back. There's this other guy who lives in the blue mountains and likes nature and meditation and the guy who does consulting for small businesses and went to Belgium to look for chocolate.
We've cooked a dozen or so recipes from the book Mum gave me for my birthday. The last one was lamb with onion marmalade. My farts smelt exactly like onion afterwards. Well that's enough vulgarity for one day.
That Core 77 website is good, there's this competition for students to design a futuristic but realistic vehicle inside and out and that would really tickle me to do something like that so I must enter it next year when I'm a little more qualified.
OK CIAO CIAO I'm going to get stuck into equations that mean curved lines and shit like that.
Love
Lizwa ¶ 17:28 0 Comments
